why not just

on $*:TEXT:/^!(cmds|evil|gay|sexy|retard|fat|n00b|smart|jealous|love)/iS:#:{
  if ($regml(1) == cmds) { msg $nick Commands are the following: !evil !gay !sexy !retard !fat !smart !n00b !jealous !love }
  else { msg # 4,1 $iif($2,$2,$nick) is $+($r(0,100),%) $regml(1) $iif($regml(1) == jealous || $regml(1) == love,of $iif($3,$3,Them Self)) }
}