I always admired this script of yours Zep, a socket would have been easier and simpler but if it does the job it does the job and this is/was unique when you made it. Never got on here to comment tho.
I will say though you could shorten it a little by setting your vars like this:
var %a blah,%b blah, %c etc
that would reduce alot of the pipes and make it look a little neater. Plus, why did you not script it around that exp alias you made? :p
Goodjob though zep