alias nt {
 if ($me isop $chan) {
    set %nt $rand(1,6)
  if (%nt == 1) { .topic $chan 13*~`11~*|*~`8~*|*~ 7-==-9 $2- 7-==-8 ~*|*~`11~*|*~`13~* 11 }
  if (%nt == 2) { .topic $chan 4,4.4,1*8,8.8,1*13,13.13,1*9,9.9,1*4,4.0,12~ $2- !4,1.8,1*13,13.13,1*9,9.9,1*4,4.0,12 }
  if (%nt == 3) { .topic $chan 13_,.=椺` `=.,. $2- _,.=椺` `=.,. }
  if (%nt == 4) { .topic $chan 11-=<{([ 12 $+ $2- 11])}>=- }
  if (%nt == 5) { .topic $chan 12-0,122,12`12,21,2`2,10,1 $2- 2,1`1,212,2`2,120,12`12,0- 11 }
  if (%nt == 6) { .topic $chan 4,00,45,44,51,55,14,1 $2- 4,00,45,44,51,55,14, 11 }
}
else { echo -a No access. | halt }
}

Or something like that :o